We always have difficulty in making choices. There is always pressure on us deciding between 2 things (read anything) even when the differences between the choices aren’t that much. The problem of choice and its associated decisions can make us all stressed out and worrisome. The same can be said for feelings that are nagging at the back of our mind about something done to us or something that your friend forgot to do and ignored or something that was not done to your liking. I have always struggled with both, choices and nagging feelings. Our first instinct is always confrontation . In the case of choices we always confront ourselves with the choices and try to evaluate and decide which way to go. In the case of nagging feelings we might try to confront or blurt with the other person / persons involved about what we think or feel. It is always dangerous to do something when we are not sure what we want or what we actually feel. Forever I have struggled with these dilemmas. One of my friend whom I met recently inspired me to an idea that has worked so well for me in the past few months. It is very simple but very handy.
“Observe your feelings about the choices or events over a period of time”
Let me explain. We can break this down into simple 4 steps :
- We have to have an item to evaluate or think over. It can be a choice , event or an experience.
- Define what a favorable outcome will look like wrt to that choice/event/experience.
- Give it some time, list the feelings and thoughts that you have about your point of contention over a period of time , say how do you feel about it in 2 weeks, how you feel in a months time based on available time.
- Eventually by the end of your slotted time your feelings would have started to kick in enabling you to make a move in the right direction.
Decisions or choices made impulsively might not work in our best interests in the long run. The above approach has helped me decide upon during my numerous outrageous moments of dilemma. Let me know what works for you in your moments of choice.
Peace out !